I wrote a lot yesterday so I didn’t write a 100-word diary entry. But something I want to remember from yesterday are the words of a Raramuri tribeswoman from the documentary series Tribal Wives. Raramuri means to walk strong, a person who walks towards well-being. “Walk your life”, she told the white woman living with them for a month. I found those words very beautiful. Simple, deep and true. When I heard them they dropped into me like pebbles into a well. I also discovered this, and now I want to write these words on 'genius' cards of my own.
~
Today I edited and posted my piece about my struggle for a homebirth. I was surprised at the vehemence of emotion it stirred up in me, even now. Also – I might actually have made a new friend. For the first time ever, a not-scary Mum at the playground started chatting to me and then asked if I’d like to meet up some time. Her younger son is one month younger than Jake. She spoke about the unfriendliness of playgroups and how hard it can be to talk to people and we exchanged numbers. I’m feeling cautiously optimistic. Time will tell.
Favourite Jake-speak from today:
Oh!? Dizzy! (after running round in circles)
Oh! Wow!! Trees! Sky! Wow!
Hot mummy, hot mummy! (after I took his top off saying it was hot and that mummy was hot too)
When I told him we were going to play in the playground, he said play and said and signed toys. Later he asked for a ball. I said I only had a tiny ball. He said and signed, tiny ball. Awight. Tiny ball, put in park?
After playing in the playground, he ran onto the grass in the park and said Sit, pease? Then he pointed to the picnic blanket in the pram. So I spread it out. Then he sat down and asked for pasta. The last time we had a picnic in that park (weeks ago!), we’d eaten pasta.
He also said the longest complete sentence he’s ever spoken. And I can’t remember what it was!
1 comment:
Ooo, I really hope the mum from the playground turns out to be nice, normal and that you like each other when you spend some more time together!
I hope writing about your homebirth struggle helped you let go of some of the anger you still feel over all that happened. It's so cool that you were able to have a wonderful birth experience at the end of it and to trust your own body and Jake to make it a success. I know you said that you don't remember much of the birth, but have you tried writing about that? - maybe focussing on writing that positive experience would be a nice kind of 'closure' (hate that word really!) to reliving the negative experiences beforehand?
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